Five Myths about Me? I'm a Legend, not a Myth.

Listen son, I do not appreciate this article. And for one simple reason which precluded me from even bothering to read the damn thing. The title says I was demoted. We all know I was not demoted. I was R-E-A-S-S-I-G-N-E-D. Big Difference. Huge. But not as huge as the genius that is me.

Money can't buy happiness

and really who wants to be happy anyway? It's all about pain relief people. And what eases the pain best of all? A raise.

Atta Boy Phil

My bitch

Phil Griffin is back on task. Griffin insisted that external pressures did not force the change. Rather, he said, it was a discussion initiated last week by Olbermann, who told him he felt uncomfortably constrained after the Republicans aired a video about the victims of the Sept. 11 attacks during their convention.

See? Told you it was all my idea to R-E-A-S-S-I-G-N me to analyst.

I just can't keep up with all the press I'm getting

You know what this means? People KNOW who I am. And they care deeply about me. I mean sure, a lot of them seem to have a lot of mean, hateful things to say about me but screw it, they at least know who I am, the greatness that is Keith Olbermann's Ego and isn't that what's really important here? Just between me and you though? I could do with all this talk about "demotion". It's not a demotion, it's a "reassignment". Got it? R-E-A-S-S-I-G-N-M-E-N-T not the "demotion" word. And if you don't believe me (and why wouldn't you believe me? I'm me, after all) then listen to my bitch Phil Griffin as he explains it all to those who can't grasp the obvious.

MSNBC president Phil Griffin told The Hollywood Reporter that the channel made the decision Thursday night after re-evaluating the wisdom of having the two of them anchoring the coverage while at the same time giving opinions. He said the network decided it was better not having them feel like they have to restrain themselves. "If you move two feet over (from the anchor desk), you can say whatever you want virtually at the same time," he said.

Actually Phil I've always said what I wanted but that's beside the point. Now I'm completely unleashed. As it should be.

It was all MY idea.

Yeah, that's the ticket. It was my idea. Who really wanted to anchor anyway? Not me.

Olbermann and Matthews will remain as analysts during major political events, and officials at both networks, who declined to be identified discussing personnel moves, said Olbermann had initiated the discussions to clarify his role

. Okay, so I was the source, but still.

They said Olbermann's influence at MSNBC would in no way be diminished and that the shift would enable him and Matthews to offer more candid analysis during live coverage.

And by "they" they mean me. And yes, I'll be candid. Very candid.

Olbermann confirmed yesterday he had initiated the discussions. "Phil and I have debated this set-up since late winter/early spring (with me saying, 'Are you sure this flies?' and him saying, 'Yes, but let's judge it event by event') and I think we both reached the same point during the RNC," Olbermann said by e-mail.

So there you have it. I demoted myself. And if I say that's what happened, that's what happened, okay?

What does the Columbia Journalism Review Know about Journalism Anyway?

Idiots.

What of viewers? How will what looks like a neat and tidy (re)adjustment from MSNBC’s point of view (ok, “experiment” over, back to one head, one hat around here — and for Matthews and Olbermann, that’s the analyst hat, not the anchor/straight news hat) translate for viewers? Will confusion persist? Will viewers even notice, if they’re still getting “analysis” from Olbermann and Matthews alongside “straight reporting” from Gregory? Once blurred, can “the line” really be un-blurred?

Didn't they get the quotes I gave to the NYT and the Washington Post about this? It was all my idea. Idiots. They lack even simple reading comprehension skills.

Conde Nast is Nasty

Portfolio does not like me. I'm not wild about them either. Some of the lies they have chosen to print about the Greatness that is Keith Olbermann's EGO can be found here.

MSNBC has finally come to its senses and taken Keith Olbermann and Chris Matthews off anchor duty -- and Olbermann's reaction perfectly illustrates why it was necessary to do so. MSNBC president Phil Griffin has said this arrangement worked because the two men "put on different hats" to anchor straight news coverage. But no one seems to have briefed Olbermann on the whole hat-switching thing. He capped off two weeks of embarrassing convention hijinx by launching into a lecture on Thursday night after the Republican National Convention featured a tribute to the victims of 9/11. Olbermann decreed the video "inappropriate" and exploitative. Olbermann claims he initiated the conversation about taking himself out of the anchor chair -- but he also tells the Times, "I found it ironic and instructive that I could have easily said exactly what I did say, exactly when I did say it, if I had been wearing a different hat, and nobody would have taken any issue." But there's nothing the least bit ironic about it, and if it was "instructive" then Olbermann knows frighteningly little about his chosen profession. The divide between news and editorial is one of the fundamentals of journalism. Some people are able to move back and forth across that divide, taking care not to allow their personal views to color their news reportage. Olbermann is evidently not one of those people. Incidentally, the Times says Olbermann has three years left on his contract, and NBC wants to re-up it through 2013. Here's a prediction: No way is Olbermann still at MSNBC in five years. This is a guy who loves to leave jobs in a mushroom cloud of righteous indignation. One or two more pirouettes by NBC management like the one that happened this weekend and he is out of there.

See? Lies. All lies. ALl of it. Every single word. I'll be there at MSNBC long after this idiot has been fired (and rightfully so) from Portfolio. Just you watch and see.