Another vote for KONBC

I'm really beginning to embrace the sound of this. I've already talked them into lots of repeats of me. I loves me some me after all and of course the viewers do too. So why not extend this out a bit? Replay the Football Night in America show from Sunday Night on a continuous loop in the overnight hours. It's have to be better than the "Red Eye" shit that FNC puts on in the middle of the night, right?

Lou Dobbs is an Idiot. And so is his wife.

I haven't liked Lou Dobbs since I first worked with the a-hole back at CNN. But seriously when did he become Dr. F'ing Phil? I'm "hanging on by a highly medicated thread?" All I have to say to MISTER Dobbs is this: At least my wife doesn't parade around airports with handguns. Okay, so technically I don't have a wife, but if I did, she wouldn't go to airports with guns.

Five Myths about Me? I'm a Legend, not a Myth.

Listen son, I do not appreciate this article. And for one simple reason which precluded me from even bothering to read the damn thing. The title says I was demoted. We all know I was not demoted. I was R-E-A-S-S-I-G-N-E-D. Big Difference. Huge. But not as huge as the genius that is me.

Seriously. Enough.

I don't know whether Keith Olbermann's Immense Ego should be happy or upset that people are continuing to write about me. Okay, fine. I can't fool my faithful readers can I? You know me. The "real" me. And God knows I love some attention. Any kind of attention. Even when it's this kind.

Don't trust anybody, especially if they agree with you, because sooner or later, they'll let you down. They'll make your brain bleed and your intestines burn with embarrassment, kind of like when you carry a torch for that special girl, only to discover she's out of reach. I'm feeling that discomfort and embarrassment after watching Keith Olbermann the past month. His politics are fine, but his credibility is in the toilet.

You know what embarasses me? This guy's writing style. And that brain bleed buddy is obviously what's causing your intense lack of intelligent thought in this stupid article you wrote which is absolutely pointless. Got it? Pointless. My credibility is beyond reproach. How dare this idiot suggest otherwise. There's more contrived crap there written by this dweeb but really, don't bother reading it. It's not worth your time. Or my attention. Even if it is about me, which as I'll freely admit, I do enjoy seeing my name in print or on the internets. Now I'm totally down with the fine suggestion of Broadcasting & Cable who has come up with the novel suggestion of completely seperating MSNBC from NBC. I've already come up with that suggestion myself. I run the network after all, they might as well rename it after me: KONBC. Is that great or what?

Please stop asking me why

it's okay that MSNBC showed images of 9/11 today when I said 2 days ago that no responsible newsroom still showed those images anymore in my latest Special Comment. It's just is okay? And it is if I say it is and that's really all you need to know. Did I tell you that I got a really big raise from MSNBC? The two aren't connected I swear.

Jon Stewart Sucks.

According to this, he is the reason that Matthews and I were R-E-A-S-S-I-G-N-E-D. You see, he mocked us. I for one did not appreciate the mockery. But of course, as you all know by now, the actual R-E-A-S-S-I-G-N-M-E-N-T was all my idea. Because Now I can say whatever the hell I want to about anyone, anytime--okay, technically, I was doing that anyway but now it's going to be off-the chain (Katy taught me that phrase. I'm hip aren't I? That's one more justification for keeping her around. It keeps me hip and happening and down-with-the-"in" lingo". Anyway, Jon Stewart mocked me. Prepare to meet your maker Stewart--it's ON!

Ahhhh. More great press.

They love me. They really love me. And why wouldn't they? I am greatness personified even when it's doing something so trivial as football highlights. It would be better if it were baseball highlights but whatever, praise is praise and I love it that this guy, this astute writer, no doubt a very intelligent man (but not as intelligenet as the genius that is me) gets me. And loves me. I am the GOLD STANDARD people. Use that phrase as often as possible about me from now on in your conversations about me. And of course you frequently talk about me. Because I'm me and I am GOLDEN.