What Heresy Is This?

What heresy is this?

So host a speaker you don't necessarily agree with, if not literally then in spirit. Listen to both Rush Limbaugh and Michael Moore, Keith Olbermann and Bill O'Reilly, President Bush and President Obama. Broaden your horizons, give your ideological opponents the same attention and respect you give your favorite columnist or commentator. Leave your opinions open to a good challenge and don't be afraid to agree with the other side on an issue or two.

WTF? Seriously, Keith Olbermann's Ego cannot believe someone would dare suggest such a thing. The right is always wrong and Keith Olbermann is always right, got it? There is no need, whatsoever, to ever listen or watch anyone other than Keith Olbermann, ever. Case closed!

Now back to more Me.

You all know that Keith Olbermann's Ego loves Keith Olbermann above and beyond anything else. Except maybe for the Yankess and baseball card collecting. Anywho, last night the Ego put his two finger-typing skills to work to produce another brilliant Special Comment, delivered to absolute perfection on last night's Countdown. Watch it. Again and Again. Marvel at just how damn good The Ego is. Then go post the love and adoration at Kos. Because there is absolutely nothing that the Ego loves more than that. That and acclaim. And lots of it.

More me.

More of Keith Olbermann is always a good thing right? Just to let you peons know that there will be at least 6 hours of the greatness that is Keith Olbermann's Massive Ego unleashed on the world on Inauguration Day, from 7 am to 1 pm Eastern. The bad news? Chris Matthews will be there with The Ego.

You know why Keith Olbermann's Ego Loves Starbucks?

Keith Olbermann's Enormous Ego loves Starbucks because they love Keith Olbermann and MSNBC, (as they should).

The inauguration coverage by the cable news channel MSNBC will be projected onto movie theater screens in 21 cities next Tuesday. The channel is also planning to announce a partnership with Starbucks to simulcast its coverage in 650 of the company’s stores.

Leave it to Gawker however to snark on the greatness that is Keith Olbermann:

The liberal cable news network's Keith Olbermann, Chris Matthews and Joe Scarborough will probably spend the entire time yelling at and viciously mocking one another, so be sure to claim your table as soon as your local Starbucks opens, so that you can enjoy that for many hours, in a caffeinated and highly-focused state.

Whatever. At least they'll be watching.

More me. Always a good thing.

Yes, that's right. Keith Olbermann's Ego is now guaranteed to be on MSNBC through the 2012 re-election of President Obama. Dig it.

NEW YORK - Nov. 10, 2008 - MSNBC has voted for four more years of Keith Olbermann and the top-rated "Countdown with Keith Olbermann," it was announced today by Phil Griffin, President, MSNBC. The new four-year agreement calls for Olbermann to continue as host of "Countdown;" additionally, Olbermann will play a prominent role in MSNBC's coverage of all major news events. He will also continue to co-host NBC's "Football Night in America" studio show.
"Keith Olbermann is at the core of MSNBC's current success," said Griffin. "'Countdown' is our signature program and I'm thrilled that we're going to be able to bring it to Keith's loyal viewers for another four year term."
"I'm delighted that we can continue to lock Countdown into the nation's political dialogue through at least the next election," said Olbermann. "Personally, I noticed that as of about six weeks ago, I'd been doing this show longer than I did SportsCenter, so it's delightful to have a true home."
In October 2008, "Countdown with Keith Olbermann" had its best month ever in the key Adults 25-54 demographic, and is up a tremendous 170 percent in A25-54 from Oct. 2007 and up 180 percent in total viewers. "Countdown" continued its dominance over CNN at 8 p.m., out-rating "Campbell Brown" by 35 percent in A25-54 and 41 percent in total viewers. Excluding coverage of the presidential debates, "Countdown" is the #3 top-rated show in cable news in A25-54. "Countdown" is also the #1 cable news show among young viewers, Adults 18-34.
Since the last presidential election in 2004, "Countdown" has seen dramatic ratings increases, up a huge 238 percent among Adults 25-54 and 206 percent in total viewers.
Olbermann, who was named one of the Top Ten Most Powerful People in TV News for 2007 and 2008 by Television Week, began his NBC career in 1997, when he was anchor for NBC Sports, hosting the World Series and Major League Baseball's All-Star Game, and contributing to pre-game coverage of the Super Bowl. During that time he was also host of two primetime news programs on MSNBC, "The Big Show" and "White House In Crisis." Olbermann returned to MSNBC in 2003 as a substitute host on "Nachman" and an anchor for MSNBC's coverage of the war in Iraq before launching "Countdown" in April of 2003. Previously, Olbermann provided twice-daily commentary, "Speaking of Sports" and "Speaking of Everything" for ABC Radio Network. Prior to that, he was a regular contributor covering news and sports on CNN.
Olbermann is well known for anchoring ESPN's "SportsCenter" from 1992 to 1997, when his inimitable style made the blend of pop culture and sports a hallmark of the modern television sports reporter. While at ESPN, Olbermann helped launch ESPN2 and ESPN Radio network and wrote the critically acclaimed book "The Big Show" with Dan Patrick about his experiences working on "SportsCenter."
He is the recipient of numerous distinguished awards in radio and television broadcasting, including the 1995 Cable Ace Award for Best Sportscaster and 11 Golden Mike Awards for excellence in television and radio. Olbermann also received two Edward R. Murrow Awards, one for his coverage of the events of 9/11 and another for the anniversary coverage of 9/11.
In addition to his extensive broadcasting experience, Olbermann has written for dozens of publications, including The New York Times, USA Today, Newsweek, Time, Sports Illustrated and Playboy. His first book, "The Major League Coaches," was published when he was 14. His latest book, "Truth & Consequences," a collection of his "Special Comments" from "Countdown," is a New York Times best-seller. He also published "The Worst Person in the World," based on the popular segment within "Countdown."
Phil Griffin is President, MSNBC. Izzy Povich is the Executive Producer, "Countdown with Keith Olbermann."

The Power of Change......but not for me

So the NY Times has picked up on the new (temporary MSNBC slogan): The Power of Change.

“Presidents have the power to change lives, to change course, to change America,” the ad’s narrator says. Before the election, the ad quoted John F. Kennedy’s famous “ask not” address. By Wednesday, it had been updated with a line from Mr. Obama’s election-night speech: “At this defining moment, change has come to America.”

Now there are lots of things I'd like to change about MSNBC. Let's start with the name for: we all know it really should be MSKONBC. Secondly? Joey Scar and his girlfriend Mika could hit the road. Today. And take that annoying little creep Willie Geist with them. Thirdly? Say goodbye Chrissie. But you know who I hope stays the same? Fox News.

On election night, Fox attracted many more viewers than MSNBC — until Mr. Obama was pronounced the victor. During the midnight hour, when Mr. Obama spoke in Chicago, MSNBC averaged 5.6 million viewers, compared with Fox’s 3.9 million.

Damn right we're your offical Obama network so there's no need for me to change one iota: I'm perfect just like I am. And why? Because I'm Keith Olbermann's Ego and I said so, that's why.

Obama should have picked Keith Olbermann as his running mate

Seriously--have you seen these ratings? People watched the moving and inspiring 30-minute Obama special and do you know what they did then? They all changed their channels to watch the greatness that is Keith Olbermann's Ego. See-if only Obama had chosen Keith Olbermann instead of Joe Biden as VP---he'd be even more popular than he already is. The Giant O ticket--think of the possibilities!

3 Debates

That's how long it took for TVNewser to figure out that Keith Olbermann's Ego wasn't exactly serving as an "analyst" for MSNBC but was instead, still serving as an anchor on debate nights. What did this fool think I was going to do? Sit alongside the likes of Chris Matthews or Joe "Scar" Scarborough like they were my equals or something? Instead I got rid of the baggage (seriously, Matthews was dragging me down) and The Ego gets Two Hours to say and do whatever the hell it wants. As it should be. Ain't life grand? It is when you are the greatness that is Keith Olbermann's Ego.

Boot Brokaw? I'm all for it.

Ha ha ha ha. My minions are hard at work. And the best part of it all? I didn't have to say a word. That'll teach Tom Brokaw to mess with the greatness that is Keith Olbermann's Ego.

Bill Maher offends me.

Sure Bill and I both went to Cornell. Of course we have a certain segment of cross-over fans (although they love and adore me more. Why wouldn't they? I am of course, me after all). But to suggest that I want to have sex with Obama is insulting (Sorry for the link to Newsbusters. Can't find the video anywhere else). Mr. Maher is just mistaken. First of all, I would never, ever do a three-way with Chris Matthews. That's just wrong on some many different levels that I won't even go there (and I really would not go there ever. I don't even want to sit next to him do you think I'd want to go any further than that?) And secondly Bill has it all wrong. If anyone wanted to have sex with anyone it would be that the Big O would want me because I'm me, Keith Olbermann. How dare Bill suggest it's the other way around? Bill Maher, today's WPITW.

I like the sound of this.

Screw Biden. I'd make a much better running mate. And I'd show my old buddy Bill a few things when it comes to young women. Kudos to my Kos pals. Told you they love, worship and adore me. But why wouldn't they? I'm me after all.

Hat tip to my friend Flowergirl.

Denver

And I'm not talking about John Denver here either. Why couldn't I have just covered this from NYC? It's not like anything is actually going to happen there. We know it's Obama-Biden. Big deal. Why don't they throw parties in MY honor instead? I'm responsible after all for bringing Democracy back to America and making MSNBC #1. Hate Denver the city and the singer. No, never actually been to Denver but how great could it possibly be? NYC and LA are the only two cities that count because those are the only cities on this earth big enough to contain Me.

New add to the enemies list: CJR

What do these guys know about journalism anyway? Merely putting the word "journalism" in your title doesn't mean you know jack about the profession. I mean come on, Faux claims to be a "news" network but we all know they are the house organ for the GOP.

That’s right, kids: last night was Special Comment night on Countdown. A little bit Murrow, a little bit O’Reilly; a little bit country, a little bit rock ‘n roll—and always filled with vitriol. Olbermann’s performance, this time around, was particularly melodramatic: as the former sports reporter swooped and spun (again, rhetorically) while railing against the “immaturity” of the GOP’s presumptive nominee, he indulged in even more Dramatic Sighs and Angered Shakes of the Head than usual. Quite the floor routine.

Okay I'm cool with the Murrow comparison. And yes, I do owe Bill-O a little something (like a guaranteed 3-5 minutes of my show devoted to him per night), but I've never liked country music. Rock and roll? Damn straight baby. I'm the Elvis of Anchormen! (What? I need a younger reference for my 25 and unders?) Okay scratch Elvis, uhm--Bono. I'm the Bono of newsanchors minus the weird sunglasses and the Irish accent. But come on, questioning my vitriol? I'm angry dammit! I'm angry at the last 8 years of this country under GOP oppression. My audience is angry too and I'm just saying what they would if they had a tv newscast. Melodramatic? It's called TV! You have to grab the audience by their balls (or other assorted genitalia) to get their attention. Swooped and spun? Yes, it's called camera blocking. All actorsanchors do it! I doubt this joker has ever even watched a local newscast let alone a nationwide, huge-hit like Countdown. "Indulged in Dramatic sighs and Angered Shakes of the Head?" Again, I'm angry. I'm expressing my anger. What's wrong with that buddy boy?

So while Olbermann, as he generally does, bolstered his bloviations with solid reporting…the whole thing was ultimately more circus than ceremony. And one lacking in, among other things, sportsmanship.

Sportsmanship? There is no sportsmanship in politics idiot. Circus? Ceremony? No, it's called news. And I'm the Murrow of the 21st Century. The NY Times said so. CJR? Who reads that crap? And trust me, this so-called review is all crap.

Next on my list? This guy from the NY Observer

So this "Steve" person at the NY Observer decided to correct me in public. Big mistake. Big. Big. Big Mistake. Huge in fact. Never, ever, do you hear me correct me in public. If I make a mistake dammit then it's your responsibility as a so-called journalist to back-me up, not correct me, got it?

If I say, and I did,

Warner's rising star might actually dim the VP chances for Virginia's current governor, Tim Kaine on this simple theory. Warner speaks on Tuesday night, the vice presidential candidate makes his acceptance speech on Wednesday night. It is unlikely that out of the universe of possible speakers, two Virginia governors would be scheduled for major speeches on successive convention nights.

then that's the way it's going to be okay? (Note to self: Call the Obama campaign immediately and make sure they're on the same page with me so I make this guy out to be a punk loser for correcting me.)

But what does this idiot do? He decides to "school" me with some alleged facts. So not cool "Steve".

Here’s the problem with this thinking: It’s surprisingly common at conventions for the keynote speaker and the V.P. nominee to hail from the same state. Like in:

* 1984, when New York Governor Mario Cuomo delivered the keynote address that made him famous, followed a few nights later by the vice-presidential acceptance speech of New York Congresswoman Geraldine Ferraro. Hell, Cuomo and Ferraro didn’t just share a home state – they came from the same borough.

* 1988, when Texas state Treasurer Ann Richards keynoted the Democratic convention in Atlanta – where fellow Texan Lloyd Bentsen was subsequently nominated for vice president.

* 1996, when Staten Island’s own Susan Molinari was Bob Dole’s handpicked keynote speaker at the Republican convention in San Diego, just as Molinari’s fellow New Yorker, former Rep. and H.U.D. Secretary Jack Kemp, was Dole V.P. choice.

* And while it’s not technically the same, it’s worth noting that Al Gore saw not problems in 2000 when, as the Democrats’ presidential nominee, he asked his fellow Tennessean Harold Ford Jr. to deliver the keynote address.

As Homer Simpson would say, "D'oh!" Look do you think I have time to go and look up little things like facts? Hell no! I've got "Annie from NY" on my ass waiting to pounce on me like a PUMA outside of 30 Rock, I've got a 20-something girlfriend (insert obligatory reference to live-in here) to support, not to mention my blogging duties at Kos. There are only so many hours in the day pal and I don't have time to do research. And my staff? They're busy running my personal errands. I'm so busy I don't even have time to reimburse them when they make expenses on my behalf-and this putz thinks I've got time to go look up something boring like who gave a damn keynote on which night in 1984 when my girlfriend wasn't even born yet? Clearly "Steve" wasn't thinking of me, Keith Olbermann, and the many demands on my time when he penned (typed) this missive.

And to add insult to injuring my bruised ego he adds this little paragraph at the end of his loser piece

I agree with the consensus that has emerged in the media: Kaine is unlikely to be Obama’s running-mate. He lacks any meaningful national security and foreign policy experience and his resume as an elected official is about as thin as Obama’s. But there's really no reason to assume that the selection of one Virginian automatically excludes another. Especially when you consider that this year’s keynote address will almost certainly be overshadowed by a certain junior senator from New York.

WTF? So why bother to even write this column if you were going to contradict yourself and admit that I was right? (And I'm always right, got it)? Loser.

So add this guy to my list along with Matthews, Maddow, assorted ex-girlfriends, Rupert Murdoch, Page Six, and my arch-nemesis, O'Reilly. Have I mentioned lately how much I hate that guy?

I'm not exactly thrilled with you either "Annie"

So this angry person writes this blog entry about me. And she actually claims to remember, word-for-word, our entire exchange when she ran into me near 30 Rock. I have no problem with her writing about me but where's the love? Where's the fawning? I need that dammit. I'm used to abuse by the GOPers; I live to make them hate me but my own liberal brethren or sisteren(real word? it is now). That's beyond the pale.

He was nervous and nerdy, hands in his pockets the whole time, he really seemed like a hollow fool. i was actually very surprised, i thought he had more than this.

Look babe, I have to save something for the show. You can't possibly expect me to waste my brilliance and wit on some chick I meet on the street.

Ok, what is with the hillary hate.I don't hate her.
gimme a break. what is your problem with her, just tell me.
i don't hate her, i hate her policies and tactics

See how angry this woman was? I love the Clintons. They invite me to parties. Hillary's mom loves me-although I kinda doubt I'll ever get another invitation to one of their parties again after this primary season no matter how many checks I write to the Clinton foundation, but still, once upon a time they loved me. And I thank you to remember that for the future, okay "Annie"?

her policies? Obama is to the right of her!
he's moving to the middle because he's trying to win!
the middle?! he agrees with alito and scalia on the death penalty, he actually wants *more* death penalties, what kind of policy is that? Now he's against affirmative action...well he's trying to winwell not only did he vote yay on fisa, but now at&t is sponsoring the convention. that's ok with you?
well, i was very mad about his vote on fisa.

See how pissed this woman was because I chose to back Obama and not her best bud Hillary? Look what was I supposed to do? Obama was going to win the nomination. And I had to back the winner dammit! And oh boy do I know about FISA. Those people at Kos nailed me to the wall on that one and I had to do a special comment and all of that because they did. They act like I owe them something because I blog on their damn site. Don't they know that it's all about me and not them? I'm there to plug my show and receive love, what don't they get about that? Anyway--don't remind me about FISA, Obama, and Daily Kos ever again okay? And by all means, don't point out the obvious to me here. If I hate Hillary's policies and tactics what else is there to actually like about her? Thank God this woman wasn't bright enough to follow through on that statement!

There's more there. She tried to make me feel bad because Hillary lost the nomination. Yada yada yada. Blah blah blah. Whatever chick.

But then she has the nerve to write this about me on her damned blog:

The entire time, NO INTELLECTUAL RESPONSE WHAT-SO-EVER. NONE. NADA. ZILCH. Nothing new, just anything that some uninformed kid on the street would say. WOW. He was very nice, but i was blown away by how lame his responses were. amazing. He even at one point mentioned that he was called a misogynist, as if he couldn't understand why! wow. Maybe he didn't think suggesting someone should kill Sen. Clinton, hatred. *shrug*.

Hey! I was polite to you so what's the problem? So I'm not the genius you thought I was? Sue me. I have a lot on my mind. Baseball. Chicks. Got it?

And I only mentioned the misogynist thing because it really hurts. You know why? This. Fifty damn thousand hits about me being a misogynist. I love women. Come on. I love them! I even live with one. And she's 23! See how much women love me? And why wouldn't they? I'm Keith Fucking Olbermann! Respect woman! Show me some respect! No love from this angry "Annie" that's for sure. Oh well who needs her? America loves me. women love me (really they do) and that's all I need. Attention and love.

Me as VP?

I like the sound of that. Sure this guy is a Republican apologist but look, he recognizes me as a potential Veep candidate. What's not to love about that?

Me and Daily Kos

I love Daily Kos. I love it so much I regularly blog and comment there. But sometimes they don't seem to love me too much. Take this guy (gal-who knows)?

On Monday during "Countdown" TV host Keith Olbermann marveled at the presence of the Leaning Tower of Pisa in the now famous "celeb" ad released by John McCain's campaign. The problem: The object to which Olbermann refers was NOT the Leaning Tower of Pisa, but a structure located at the site of Obama's Berlin speech, called the "Victory Column".

Listen you little creep, if I say it's the Leaning Tower of Pisa, it's the Leaning Tower of Pisa got it?

That's not all. Olbermann also claimed to have seen the Washington Monument in the ad in question, which is flat-out false. The Washington Monument is not in the ad either.

Does this guy/gal actually think I have the kind of time to watch the damn ad?

Turns out he does.

Keith is both clueless and arrogant, hence my decision to make him center of this diary. Furthermore, as progressive media critic Bob Somerby observed today "He’d (Olbermann) had twelve hours to check his facts—but he still was repeating these world-class blunders..."

Okay I'll own up to being arrogant. I am Keith Olbermann's Ego after all. But clueless? Me? No, I just don't have the kind of time to watch this stuff. I have staff for that buddy.

Okay so I screwed up. Big deal, Washington Monument, Leaning Tower of Pisa, whatever. They're both big and white, right? What's the big diff exactly? I was close enough. But this little creep continued on to insult me even further:

Spare us the BS next time, Keith, and start justifying the ginormous salary MSNBC pays you. Watching the video was all it took for you to have avoided making an ass of yourself. Too late now.

I have feelings. I hurt. I need love. I need so much love. Thankfully my Kossacks were there to defend me. 300 plus comments baby! I am the king! I am the King of All Media. (Yeah I know that's Howard Stern's title but does he has his own cable news network tv show? Does he run a damn cable news network like I do? That's what I thought). Where was I? Oh yes, The love. My Kossacks love me. And that's the way I Keith Olbermann's ego loves it.

Nothing to see here. Move along.

Damn Dana Milbank! So who the hell does he think he is to give an interview to Politico? Who cares about him anyway? I made the official statement about this entire affair le Milbank on my official website of record, Daily Kos. What more could there possibly be to say but this:

This saved your crack Countdown staff an increasingly difficult decision. For nearly a week we'd been waiting for him to offer a correction
or an explanation for his column from last week in which he apparently reported
an Obama quote without a full context turned the meaning of the quote
inside-out.We had decided not to have Dana on this news-hour again until this was cleared up, and, sadly after some very happy years, he's apparently chosen to make that cloud permanent

I fired him because he lied about Obama dammit! That is the entire story. The true story. So what does the little bastard do? Contradict me!What if those damn Kossacks find out I lied to them? The nerve of Milbank--telling the Politico I really got pissed with him after he said something nice about a Republican. Hey everybody knows the ground rules of my show. No nice talk about the GOP-it makes the Kos crowd very unhappy when anyone does that. And the Kossacks have to love me. Because I need love and approval. Lots of love and approval. But what if a few of them believe him? What then? What about me?

So what if I used his defection to CNN to play up to the Kossacks and claim he was fired when he was history a month or more ago? It is about me after all and what is best for me, not anyone else, not the fans, not Milbank and damn sure not that Bill-O guy on Fox. Hate him. (Note to self: Add Milbank to enemies list-pronto. And that bastard at Politico for believing him and printing the truth.) The only truth that matters after all is my version of it.