This is just too easy sometimes. Why it's almost like taking Candy from babies. Keith Olbermann's Ego loves his fans. You wanna know why? They aren't that great with critical thinking skills. For example, they don't notice patterns at all. Patterns you say? What are these patterns that The Ego speaks of? Watch and learn my friends, watch and learn.
Step 1: Someone prints or posts a negative story about Keith Olbermann's Ego.
Step 2: The Ego immediately takes to either the airwaves or Daily Kos (or both) to brand the person who wrote it as someone who has it out for him (Example: Lloyd Grove (NY Post, The Daily Beast), Brian Stelter (The NY Times), Dan Abram's Mediaite.
Step 3: For good measure, attack the venue where the attack appeared (Examples: The New York Times, The Post, the Daily News (and going back to the old days, the LA Times), Gawker, Cityfile, Wonkette, etc., etc.,
Step 4: Go to Kos, post a diary offering a very special, special comment or some sort of "must-see TV" to pump the ratings. Even if the special comment isn't necessarily related to the attack from these vicious people who all hate the Ego, look, the fans will still tune in and pump up the Ego's ratings. The Ego loves ratings you know. And Daily Kos.
Step 5: Go on Countdown and deliver WPITW awards, offer up a very special, special comment. Drives the attacker wild (and the fans believe every word, it's a win-win for The Ego).
Step 6: Sit back and laugh. Really, it's too easy. Look at yesterday: it was a beautiful thing to see. Did you notice how Keith Olbermann's Ego piled upon young Brian and the NY Times? Brian has been one of The Ego's biggest supporters since he was still in college and ran the then-CableNewser. And the NY Times? The NY Times loves my ass. Oh right, revionist thinking: they hate the Ego! Yes, that's right, the Times is now an enemy of Keith Olbermann. So what if four sources either with MSNBC or Fox told the NY Times that the deal happened? It did not happen! I mean really, who are you going to believe? The Ego or the NY Times and the statements from corporate stooges? Right! The Ego is always, always right. And so what that The Ego didn't bother mentioning O'Reilly from June 1st to August 3rd, whatever would give anyone the idea there was a deal? You got it! Because The Ego told them so! See what I mean? Easy as pie.
Step 7: This is Keith Olbermann's Ego's favorite step. You see, my fans are so
What? You don't think The Ego would ever do such a thing? Trust me, it happens.
And The Ego wants you to know he applies these steps at work too. Why just yesterday The Ego had MSNBC prez (and longtime KO
See how easy it is? And you know why it's easy for Keith Olbermann's Ego? Because Keith Olbermann's Ego is a freaking genius that's why people! The Ego tells people what the Truth is (according to Keith Olbermann) and it's true! Or isn't true, whatever the case might be and whatever approach is most flattering for The Ego. And people believe it. What could be better than that? I'm a GOD people. A God! And don't you ever forget it!
Now please excuse the Ego, it's time for some pie.
And at the suggestion of Marcia X 3: please enjoy the musical stylings of Steely Dan and their version of Pretzel Logic (which naturally is not as good as Keith Olbermann's Ego's version).