Friday, August 8, 2008

In defense of egos

So John Edwards had this to say today,
It is inadequate to say to the people who believed in me that I am sorry, as it is inadequate to say to the people who love me that I am sorry. In the course of several campaigns, I started to believe that I was special and became increasingly egocentric and narcissistic. If you want to beat me up - feel free. You cannot beat me up more than I have already beaten up myself. I have been stripped bare and will now work with everything I have to help my family and others who need my help.

I'll tell you what's inadequate here John, it's this statement you gave on cheating on my pal Elizabeth (you know she totally loves me and watches my show right?) Let me count the ways you went wrong with this statement. First off, you use the words egocenric, and narcissistic like they are a bad thing. Egos aren't bad John, and I should know, right? So don't run from it John: own it. embrace it. Just go with it: admit you're a self-centered, egotistical, narcissistic SOB. You want to be president of the US. Why would you possibly want to be running for president if you weren't a total me-freak? You have to be an egomaniac to want to run the free world right pal? I hear you man. I understand what it's like to live with a massive ego. Mine's so big it had to have its own blog (Kos wasn't big enough for us both).

Mistake numbero two-o? Suggesting that it's something you have to "reform" from. Why the hell would you want your ego to reform? Yeah sure you're going through hell right now but you know what my pal Winston Churchill said? Keep going! (OK I really didn't know Winston Churchill but it sounds so impressive when I quote him doesn't it?) Having a big fat ego is a wonderful thing. I love mine. Look where it's gotten me! I have my own cable tv show network. Yeah, I run MSNBC. That's how big a damn deal I am: I have my own cable news network.

Number three: The old chick? No man. So not the way to roll. You get 'em young. Trust me, they're easier to con than these old chicks are. And paying one for a "job"? Hook them up with their own job, not just the fake BS job you got your piece. Trust me on this: a real job keeps them busy, occupied and out of the house so you can score even more chicks on the side. Because when you have egos like we do John, you're a babe-magnet, right my friend?

And number 4? Oh man. Meeting a woman in a hotel? Don't even get me started on that one. self-explanatory.

Since this is a Countdown, I need a number 5. Nope. I got nothing more to say. Just this. I knew I was right when I picked Lizzie over you for Pres.

1 comment:

marinara said...

Nice blog, KOE. You and Flowergirl need more exposure. Don't look to Olbermannwatch for that, or you'll have no credibility with fans who feel the need to bash him once in a while without being attacked all over the place.