So Dan made his debut on the NBC Networks last night in his new role as a co-host with me on Football Night in America. Yeah America, that's right, we're going to be kicking it old school style just like we did back in the day at ESPN where we created Sports TV Anchoring as you know it. You know those wise-ass guys who think they're funny on local TV? You can thank me and Dan for inspiring them. Even though they are all just sad, pale imitators of the genuine article. Anyway so Dan was on with me last night on Countdown. And what did the SOB do? Posed himself so his Emmy Award was visible behind him throughout the whole damn interview. So what if he won an Emmy for Sports Hosting. Big f'ing deal. I have an ACE award for doing the same thing. He can take that Emmy and put it up......well, you get the picture.
P.S.: Whatever idiot on my staff who set up that live-shot? You're so fired.
Oh and Deadspin? You're on my list now too. What do you mean we failed to recapture the magic? It was a 3-minute freaking interview! Watch us this fall and weep as we recreate history, make magic, kick ass and take names. You ask why we're still relevant? Because I'm Keith Olbermann and that's all you need to know. Worship me. Please worship me. I need love. Lots of love. And fawning. Lots and lots of fawning. And nothing less is acceptable to me. And Patrick? Same goes for you. Kiss my fat ass because you and I both know you'd never have gotten the NFL gig without me, Keith Olbermann. Just call me "Sir" and we'll get along just fine, got it?